Time to sort out the down side of being well looked after when you are ill....The Bills! They are coming in thick and fast.. and as a Brit now living in the US they have come as a bit of a shock as I am so used to the wonderful British NHS. Every doctors visit..blood test and medical procedure has to be paid for so thank goodness Hubby has excellent medical insurance through his work. I would hate to think where we would be without it!
I am not complaining tho as once they discovered the lump.. the ball moved very fast. And the care continues. I am very grateful to be in the right place at the right time.
Im just so sorry that MrD has to work so hard to pay them...but with with his usual attitude...he brushes it off and says Im worth every cent.
Im having more blood tests today.. ready for next weeks chemo/radiation therapy. Oh joy! There is a reason I only have one piercing.. and no tattoos..
I absolutely loathe needles...even though I have given blood once or twice in the past. For some reason I am getting myself a bit worked up about it and a bit tearful. Silly I know. I think I must be just very tired, nervous about next week and a bit weary of all the blood tests I have had over the last couple of months, I feel like a pin cushion
Ah well...its all part of the process of getting rid of the little devils floating inside me. So its time to keep drinking gallons of water.. grit my teeth and thank my Father in Heaven for bringing me this far. After all its only a little needle...
I've been doing a lot of reading..I'm not sure if thats a good or bad thing.. but I want to be as informed as possible about my upcoming treatment. I have read several accounts from people who have been through the same as me, their advice on dealing with what happens and the things that have helped them cope with or eased their discomfort.
I think the thing that struck me most is that they all said that 'the fear of the unknown' was incredibly overwhelming when going in for the first treatment. I am so glad I am not alone in that. Also it seems what affects one..can be completely different for another. So I have been taking notes
Someone suggested pure Aloe to help the area where the chemo is injected to help with the burning. Another person suggested cream for third degree burns....a bit worrying... and rather expensive.. but I will look into it
Also.. it appears my taste buds may be affected ...even drinking water can be disgusting and you have to drink a lot. So I have to find something that will mask the taste. Kool Aid has been suggested so I guess I can give it a try. It may be that a food I love one day... I wont be able to stomach the next. Trial and error I suppose... and I mustn't worry about waste
So.. I decided to have a favourite for breakfast. 'Chucky Egg' and "Toasty Soldiers". Oh I hope my taste buds dont change for that! Then Im taking a little walk down to the shops for a browse. Its not too far..and I need to make the most of fresh air and sunshine as I dont know how Im going to feel over the next few months. It will do me the power of good
The last two weeks have flown by. My baby girl has now gone home and the house seems so empty..and just a bit messy. Well there was no time for any kind of housework! She and Peter...and MrD of course.. made the time amazing.. and very exhausting. Sunday MrD and I went food shopping..and dozed for the rest of the day.
So yesterday, I pushed myself...maybe a bit much...got all the laundry done...changed beds...cleaned and vacuumed. The house is now on a par I can live with and is ready for next little adventure.. my chemo/radiation therapy which starts this time next week. Not as much fun as the last fortnight!
Im a bit scared of the unknown...but Im sure I will be ok once I know how it feels. I do wish my mum was still here.. but I can still talk to her and Im sure she is listening. Plus.. all the love and support Im receiving from everyone is helping so much. Thank you
So..what did Dr Phan tell me. Well...he seems very optimistic. He said that the tumour was gone...they got it all out. It hadnt been attached to my bowel...but it had spread to my fallopian tubes. Even though everything was removed.. because of its position..cancer cells have escaped into my body. So...they have to be zapped. On May 2nd I will be starting a mixture of radiation and chemo therapy. I will need approx 6 treatments..on a three week cycle. Each treatment will last 6 hours. I will have to be careful..monitor all my reactions and we have Dr Phans personal number in case I get a high temperature, mind muddled etc. Hubby is not too bothered if I get chemo brain...he says Im like that normally..cheek!
So...not so bad. It will be like Star Wars inside me. I will possibly lose my hair..but Im not bothered. I knew I had a drawer full of scarves for a reason...and if Im lucky it will grow back naturally blond....with a slight wave. I will just have to stay away from bowling alleys in case they try to stick two fingers up my nose and try and throw me down the lane!!
Now...I have a confession...for the first time in this whole cancer episode ..Im a little scared. I watched my dad suffer with chemo...and it upset me terribly. Maybe its the fear of the unknown. Maybe its because Im so tired of needles. Maybe its because the doc has said its like poison being injected and it could burn. What ever it is.. Im having bad dreams about it. I hope my mind will settle after my first treatment.
What ever happens I have a fantastic support system and at the end of it I will be cancer free and be able to get back to normal
Until then I will just keep enjoying this wonderful life I have been given...and continue to capture the beauty that surrounds me.. I am so blessed
Today was the first visit to the chemo doctor to see what's what...
and I had plenty of company
But what the doctor said can wait....something more important happened. The lovely Mr P proposed to Miss C... and she said yes!! And...he got down on one knee!!
It was a case of third time lucky. The 1st night we tried for the proposal.. was when we went up to the observatory that looks over the whole of LA . Its spectacular at night time .. but literally 100s and 100s of people had the same idea and we couldn't park..The only place we could stop was by a garbage area..not appropriate. Strike One!
So next day we went to Universal Studios and were going to get a sunset afterwards.. but she was ill and we had to come home...Strike two!
So today..after the doctors.. I was feeling a bit ill and tired..but no way was this going to stop me. We drove to the pier in Santa Monica. It was freezing cold and the wind was bitter... but as the sun went down he dropped to one knee. He did a good job... she was totally surprised...and mother cried!
You have heard the saying " the mother of all lies" .. well that has been me.. trying to hide the ring from her and make up stories for going places.You should have seen me move when she tried to go into my bag at the doctors office! Don't you love kids? Well I do....and she honestly couldnt ask for a nicer lad...I know they will be very happy together
Its so good to have them both here. I have missed her so much
She hugged me tightly...then I was totally forgotten for a few seconds..when she spotted paparazzi...and she was so excited to catch a glimpse of.... Kendall Jenner. Go figure.. But at least it was a perfect start to her holiday
Well..the follow up meeting with the surgeon went well. Im mending quite nicely. As well as the ovarian tumour..the cancer was also found in my fallopian tubes. But all that has been removed. My cancer is at stage 2 so its quite early and he is confident the chemo will be successful. Its a relief!
And on another happy note...24 hours from now we will be meeting MrP and MissC at LAX. Im so excited. I know she is a beautiful young woman....